Rick Astleys
75-30
Manager: Jeff Burris
In-house attorney who named his team after a British pop star famous for a song from 1987. In-house attorneys review contracts, flag liability, and read the fine print nobody else reads. They're right about it, and nobody thanks them. Has the most wins and is somehow still second - correct in every measurable way and still chasing. His team plays like a well-drafted legal brief: airtight, slightly formal, ultimately successful.
Injured List
Ken Howell
Returns Aug 9
Lou Whitaker
Returns Aug 10
Batters
Simulated 2026
Real Life 1989
| Player | AVG | AB | H | 2B | 3B | HR | RBI | R | BB | K | SB |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| A Farm Astley, Rick | 0.000 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
| Astley, Rick | 0.280 | 175 | 49 | 8 | 0 | 12 | 28 | 32 | 14 | 27 | 6 |
| Boggs, Wade | 0.338 | 305 | 103 | 28 | 4 | 5 | 52 | 60 | 57 | 28 | 8 |
| Boone, Bob | 0.150 | 60 | 9 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 4 | 4 | 9 | 0 |
| Caminiti, Ken | 0.271 | 129 | 35 | 5 | 2 | 1 | 13 | 14 | 5 | 23 | 1 |
| Davis, Eric | 0.303 | 423 | 128 | 10 | 1 | 41 | 118 | 89 | 53 | 121 | 11 |
| Davis, Glenn | 0.227 | 141 | 32 | 4 | 0 | 12 | 28 | 27 | 9 | 35 | 0 |
| Dykstra, Lenny | 0.000 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
| Espinoza, Alvaro | 0.100 | 10 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
| Gagne, Greg | 0.258 | 399 | 103 | 23 | 3 | 5 | 62 | 59 | 8 | 76 | 9 |
| Grace, Mark | 0.288 | 302 | 87 | 17 | 2 | 5 | 53 | 45 | 37 | 34 | 7 |
| Milligan, Randy | 0.281 | 253 | 71 | 14 | 3 | 5 | 33 | 51 | 58 | 71 | 11 |
| Orsulak, Joe | 0.363 | 223 | 81 | 13 | 6 | 5 | 40 | 39 | 21 | 23 | 6 |
| Raines, Tim | 0.301 | 419 | 126 | 17 | 8 | 6 | 44 | 92 | 71 | 49 | 35 |
| Tartabull, Danny | 0.344 | 131 | 45 | 4 | 0 | 14 | 34 | 27 | 21 | 28 | 0 |
| Tettleton, Mickey | 0.254 | 339 | 86 | 16 | 0 | 22 | 62 | 68 | 52 | 95 | 3 |
| Thompson, Robby | 0.257 | 152 | 39 | 8 | 4 | 5 | 23 | 21 | 8 | 34 | 1 |
| Whitaker, Lou | 0.276 | 232 | 64 | 6 | 3 | 11 | 41 | 44 | 43 | 24 | 1 |
| Player | AB | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| A Farm Astley, Rick | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Astley, Rick | 101 | 0.307 | 0.360 | 0.505 | 0.865 |
| Boggs, Wade | 42 | 0.357 | 0.413 | 0.476 | 0.889 |
| Boone, Bob | 31 | 0.161 | 0.206 | 0.290 | 0.496 |
| Caminiti, Ken | 90 | 0.278 | 0.301 | 0.389 | 0.690 |
| Davis, Eric | 116 | 0.276 | 0.384 | 0.603 | 0.987 |
| Davis, Glenn | 102 | 0.235 | 0.264 | 0.529 | 0.793 |
| Dykstra, Lenny | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Espinoza, Alvaro | 9 | 0.111 | 0.111 | 0.111 | 0.222 |
| Gagne, Greg | 129 | 0.349 | 0.346 | 0.527 | 0.873 |
| Grace, Mark | 46 | 0.283 | 0.298 | 0.413 | 0.711 |
| Milligan, Randy | 11 | 0.273 | 0.385 | 0.273 | 0.658 |
| Orsulak, Joe | 28 | 0.321 | 0.323 | 0.357 | 0.680 |
| Raines, Tim | 118 | 0.246 | 0.373 | 0.339 | 0.712 |
| Tartabull, Danny | 104 | 0.385 | 0.455 | 0.817 | 1.272 |
| Tettleton, Mickey | 97 | 0.268 | 0.317 | 0.598 | 0.915 |
| Thompson, Robby | 117 | 0.291 | 0.339 | 0.513 | 0.852 |
| Whitaker, Lou | 26 | 0.346 | 0.414 | 0.731 | 1.145 |
| Player | AB | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| A Farm Astley, Rick | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Astley, Rick | 74 | 0.243 | 0.287 | 0.568 | 0.855 |
| Boggs, Wade | 263 | 0.335 | 0.448 | 0.510 | 0.958 |
| Boone, Bob | 29 | 0.138 | 0.194 | 0.172 | 0.366 |
| Caminiti, Ken | 39 | 0.256 | 0.293 | 0.308 | 0.601 |
| Davis, Eric | 307 | 0.313 | 0.375 | 0.629 | 1.004 |
| Davis, Glenn | 39 | 0.205 | 0.295 | 0.462 | 0.757 |
| Dykstra, Lenny | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Espinoza, Alvaro | 1 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Gagne, Greg | 270 | 0.215 | 0.239 | 0.293 | 0.532 |
| Grace, Mark | 256 | 0.289 | 0.368 | 0.406 | 0.774 |
| Milligan, Randy | 242 | 0.281 | 0.420 | 0.426 | 0.846 |
| Orsulak, Joe | 195 | 0.369 | 0.433 | 0.569 | 1.002 |
| Raines, Tim | 301 | 0.322 | 0.417 | 0.455 | 0.872 |
| Tartabull, Danny | 27 | 0.185 | 0.333 | 0.222 | 0.555 |
| Tettleton, Mickey | 242 | 0.248 | 0.361 | 0.455 | 0.816 |
| Thompson, Robby | 35 | 0.143 | 0.189 | 0.286 | 0.475 |
| Whitaker, Lou | 206 | 0.267 | 0.386 | 0.437 | 0.823 |
Pitchers
Simulated 2026
Real Life 1989
| Player | ERA | WHIP | W | L | SV | G | GS | INN | H | ER | BB | K |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Candiotti, Tom | 4.34 | 1.30 | 7 | 4 | 0 | 15 | 15 | 95.1 | 103 | 46 | 21 | 65 |
| DeLeon, Jose | 3.51 | 1.16 | 12 | 3 | 0 | 22 | 22 | 143.2 | 114 | 56 | 52 | 114 |
| Eckersley, Dennis | 2.33 | 0.59 | 3 | 3 | 19 | 42 | 0 | 58.0 | 29 | 15 | 5 | 56 |
| Garrelts, Scott | 2.27 | 1.08 | 15 | 1 | 0 | 23 | 23 | 146.2 | 122 | 37 | 37 | 89 |
| Honeycutt, Rick | 4.18 | 1.46 | 4 | 1 | 0 | 29 | 0 | 28.0 | 27 | 13 | 14 | 12 |
| Howell, Ken | 4.55 | 1.33 | 5 | 4 | 0 | 16 | 16 | 95.0 | 84 | 48 | 42 | 86 |
| Jones, Doug | 3.86 | 1.18 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 20 | 0 | 28.0 | 29 | 12 | 4 | 17 |
| Nelson, Gene | 5.40 | 1.28 | 1 | 4 | 3 | 22 | 0 | 25.0 | 20 | 15 | 12 | 19 |
| Russell, Jeff | 1.36 | 0.57 | 5 | 1 | 3 | 47 | 0 | 59.2 | 25 | 9 | 9 | 58 |
| Smith, Bryn | 2.72 | 1.06 | 16 | 3 | 0 | 23 | 23 | 145.2 | 126 | 44 | 29 | 74 |
| Sutcliffe, Rick | 3.86 | 1.43 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7.0 | 7 | 3 | 3 | 2 |
| Wells, David | 2.95 | 1.14 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 43 | 0 | 64.0 | 48 | 21 | 25 | 47 |
| Wetteland, John | 3.38 | 1.50 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 13 | 1 | 26.2 | 27 | 10 | 13 | 30 |
Batting line allowed vs LHB
| Player | AB | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WHIP |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Candiotti, Tom | 184 | 0.261 | 0.295 | 0.391 | 0.686 | 1.26 |
| DeLeon, Jose | 273 | 0.242 | 0.326 | 0.399 | 0.725 | 1.45 |
| Eckersley, Dennis | 102 | 0.167 | 0.173 | 0.235 | 0.408 | 0.64 |
| Garrelts, Scott | 256 | 0.250 | 0.316 | 0.406 | 0.722 | 1.39 |
| Honeycutt, Rick | 30 | 0.200 | 0.333 | 0.500 | 0.833 | 1.50 |
| Howell, Ken | 181 | 0.243 | 0.335 | 0.370 | 0.705 | 1.51 |
| Jones, Doug | 62 | 0.274 | 0.297 | 0.435 | 0.732 | 1.27 |
| Nelson, Gene | 44 | 0.295 | 0.404 | 0.477 | 0.881 | 2.03 |
| Russell, Jeff | 78 | 0.192 | 0.250 | 0.231 | 0.481 | 0.95 |
| Smith, Bryn | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | — |
| Sutcliffe, Rick | 10 | 0.200 | 0.385 | 0.400 | 0.785 | 1.88 |
| Wells, David | 61 | 0.180 | 0.261 | 0.344 | 0.605 | 1.08 |
| Wetteland, John | 48 | 0.250 | 0.315 | 0.292 | 0.607 | 1.42 |
Batting line allowed vs RHB
| Player | AB | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WHIP |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Candiotti, Tom | 186 | 0.296 | 0.335 | 0.473 | 0.808 | 1.53 |
| DeLeon, Jose | 260 | 0.185 | 0.248 | 0.342 | 0.590 | 0.93 |
| Eckersley, Dennis | 99 | 0.121 | 0.163 | 0.333 | 0.496 | 0.55 |
| Garrelts, Scott | 288 | 0.201 | 0.233 | 0.288 | 0.521 | 0.91 |
| Honeycutt, Rick | 77 | 0.273 | 0.341 | 0.416 | 0.757 | 1.55 |
| Howell, Ken | 181 | 0.221 | 0.289 | 0.398 | 0.687 | 1.21 |
| Jones, Doug | 49 | 0.245 | 0.288 | 0.306 | 0.594 | 1.14 |
| Nelson, Gene | 49 | 0.143 | 0.200 | 0.184 | 0.384 | 0.79 |
| Russell, Jeff | 122 | 0.082 | 0.110 | 0.189 | 0.299 | 0.38 |
| Smith, Bryn | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | — |
| Sutcliffe, Rick | 16 | 0.313 | 0.313 | 0.375 | 0.688 | 1.36 |
| Wells, David | 174 | 0.213 | 0.294 | 0.270 | 0.564 | 1.20 |
| Wetteland, John | 55 | 0.273 | 0.365 | 0.455 | 0.820 | 1.73 |
