Nicaragua Crepe Wrappers
59-47
Manager: Chris Carpenter
A minister who named his team the Nicaragua Crepe Wrappers - means absolutely nothing and somehow fits perfectly. The ecclesiastical of team names. Asks nothing of you. Simply is. Exists in a state of pastoral acceptance of its own absurdity. Mark Langston is his trial - shows up every fifth day, delivers a sermon nobody wanted, walks four people, and leaves with his head held high.
Injured List
Barry Bonds
Returns Aug 10
Jim Acker
Returns Aug 22
Batters
Simulated 2026
Real Life 1989
| Player | AVG | AB | H | 2B | 3B | HR | RBI | R | BB | K | SB |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| A Farm Carpente, Chris | 0.000 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
| Alomar, Roberto | 0.277 | 314 | 87 | 7 | 1 | 1 | 23 | 39 | 20 | 34 | 18 |
| Baines, Harold | 0.297 | 327 | 97 | 18 | 2 | 11 | 51 | 53 | 48 | 49 | 1 |
| Bonds, Barry | 0.279 | 305 | 85 | 15 | 4 | 15 | 56 | 53 | 35 | 48 | 16 |
| Browne, Jerry | 0.295 | 95 | 28 | 5 | 0 | 1 | 9 | 14 | 10 | 11 | 1 |
| Calderon, Ivan | 0.296 | 125 | 37 | 10 | 1 | 4 | 23 | 25 | 9 | 24 | 2 |
| Carpenter, Chris | 0.252 | 404 | 102 | 15 | 1 | 14 | 63 | 58 | 47 | 60 | 11 |
| Dawson, Andre | 0.307 | 88 | 27 | 8 | 0 | 11 | 29 | 21 | 7 | 13 | 1 |
| Hayes, Von | 0.000 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
| Joyner, Wally | 0.000 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
| Mattingly, Don | 0.298 | 453 | 135 | 15 | 6 | 7 | 63 | 70 | 25 | 29 | 0 |
| Pena, Tony | 0.266 | 79 | 21 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 8 | 2 | 8 | 0 |
| Puckett, Kirby | 0.326 | 469 | 153 | 36 | 4 | 4 | 48 | 80 | 21 | 55 | 9 |
| Ripken, Cal | 0.217 | 382 | 83 | 11 | 1 | 10 | 54 | 43 | 27 | 47 | 1 |
| Seitzer, Kevin | 0.288 | 302 | 87 | 7 | 4 | 3 | 45 | 41 | 39 | 45 | 4 |
| Steinbach, Terry | 0.278 | 299 | 83 | 13 | 1 | 6 | 38 | 30 | 16 | 58 | 0 |
| Templeton, Garry | 0.000 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
| Van Slyke, Andy | 0.000 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 |
| Wallach, Tim | 0.262 | 84 | 22 | 6 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 14 | 12 | 9 | 2 |
| Player | AB | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| A Farm Carpente, Chris | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Alomar, Roberto | 29 | 0.241 | 0.241 | 0.276 | 0.517 |
| Baines, Harold | 37 | 0.162 | 0.244 | 0.297 | 0.541 |
| Bonds, Barry | 35 | 0.400 | 0.476 | 0.771 | 1.247 |
| Browne, Jerry | 60 | 0.350 | 0.400 | 0.417 | 0.817 |
| Calderon, Ivan | 72 | 0.347 | 0.400 | 0.639 | 1.039 |
| Carpenter, Chris | 90 | 0.278 | 0.340 | 0.500 | 0.840 |
| Dawson, Andre | 72 | 0.319 | 0.372 | 0.764 | 1.136 |
| Hayes, Von | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Joyner, Wally | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Mattingly, Don | 108 | 0.352 | 0.376 | 0.417 | 0.793 |
| Pena, Tony | 49 | 0.306 | 0.327 | 0.327 | 0.654 |
| Puckett, Kirby | 101 | 0.257 | 0.262 | 0.347 | 0.609 |
| Ripken, Cal | 77 | 0.169 | 0.200 | 0.221 | 0.421 |
| Seitzer, Kevin | 18 | 0.389 | 0.621 | 0.556 | 1.177 |
| Steinbach, Terry | 45 | 0.311 | 0.326 | 0.511 | 0.837 |
| Templeton, Garry | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Van Slyke, Andy | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Wallach, Tim | 66 | 0.258 | 0.364 | 0.424 | 0.788 |
| Player | AB | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| A Farm Carpente, Chris | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Alomar, Roberto | 285 | 0.281 | 0.327 | 0.319 | 0.646 |
| Baines, Harold | 290 | 0.314 | 0.405 | 0.486 | 0.891 |
| Bonds, Barry | 270 | 0.263 | 0.333 | 0.467 | 0.800 |
| Browne, Jerry | 35 | 0.200 | 0.300 | 0.314 | 0.614 |
| Calderon, Ivan | 53 | 0.226 | 0.250 | 0.283 | 0.533 |
| Carpenter, Chris | 314 | 0.245 | 0.326 | 0.369 | 0.695 |
| Dawson, Andre | 16 | 0.250 | 0.294 | 0.813 | 1.107 |
| Hayes, Von | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Joyner, Wally | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Mattingly, Don | 345 | 0.281 | 0.313 | 0.400 | 0.713 |
| Pena, Tony | 30 | 0.200 | 0.200 | 0.200 | 0.400 |
| Puckett, Kirby | 368 | 0.345 | 0.382 | 0.473 | 0.855 |
| Ripken, Cal | 305 | 0.230 | 0.282 | 0.357 | 0.639 |
| Seitzer, Kevin | 284 | 0.282 | 0.346 | 0.356 | 0.702 |
| Steinbach, Terry | 254 | 0.272 | 0.308 | 0.366 | 0.674 |
| Templeton, Garry | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Van Slyke, Andy | 0 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 | 0.000 |
| Wallach, Tim | 18 | 0.278 | 0.333 | 0.444 | 0.777 |
Pitchers
Simulated 2026
Real Life 1989
| Player | ERA | WHIP | W | L | SV | G | GS | INN | H | ER | BB | K |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Acker, Jim | 3.46 | 1.17 | 10 | 1 | 1 | 47 | 0 | 65.0 | 59 | 25 | 17 | 50 |
| Clemens, Roger | 2.95 | 1.16 | 11 | 6 | 0 | 21 | 21 | 149.2 | 123 | 49 | 51 | 139 |
| Henke, Tom | 4.95 | 1.60 | 1 | 2 | 1 | 17 | 0 | 20.0 | 28 | 11 | 4 | 31 |
| Key, Jimmy | 4.60 | 1.26 | 6 | 6 | 0 | 21 | 21 | 129.0 | 143 | 66 | 20 | 68 |
| Langston, Mark | 4.77 | 1.47 | 4 | 7 | 0 | 20 | 20 | 117.0 | 124 | 62 | 48 | 107 |
| McDowell, Roger | 7.40 | 1.68 | 3 | 1 | 2 | 22 | 0 | 24.1 | 30 | 20 | 11 | 21 |
| Olson, Gregg | 3.19 | 1.06 | 2 | 2 | 21 | 35 | 0 | 36.2 | 28 | 13 | 11 | 35 |
| Orosco, Jesse | 4.63 | 1.41 | 2 | 5 | 2 | 40 | 0 | 44.2 | 41 | 23 | 22 | 50 |
| Pena, Alejandro | 4.39 | 1.34 | 2 | 1 | 1 | 45 | 0 | 65.2 | 67 | 32 | 21 | 54 |
| Saberhagen, Bret | 4.21 | 1.27 | 8 | 10 | 0 | 22 | 22 | 139.0 | 147 | 65 | 29 | 112 |
| Welch, Bob | 3.53 | 1.22 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 21 | 21 | 130.0 | 119 | 51 | 39 | 85 |
| Whitson, Ed | 5.04 | 1.40 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 13 | 1 | 25.0 | 23 | 14 | 12 | 12 |
Batting line allowed vs LHB
| Player | AB | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WHIP |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Acker, Jim | 119 | 0.244 | 0.311 | 0.336 | 0.647 | 1.37 |
| Clemens, Roger | 276 | 0.225 | 0.301 | 0.330 | 0.631 | 1.30 |
| Henke, Tom | 38 | 0.342 | 0.405 | 0.474 | 0.879 | 2.04 |
| Key, Jimmy | 52 | 0.096 | 0.094 | 0.212 | 0.306 | 0.32 |
| Langston, Mark | 82 | 0.122 | 0.200 | 0.220 | 0.420 | 0.67 |
| McDowell, Roger | 50 | 0.380 | 0.426 | 0.440 | 0.866 | 2.23 |
| Olson, Gregg | 58 | 0.121 | 0.177 | 0.190 | 0.367 | 0.65 |
| Orosco, Jesse | 45 | 0.133 | 0.250 | 0.178 | 0.428 | 1.00 |
| Pena, Alejandro | 123 | 0.293 | 0.343 | 0.439 | 0.782 | 1.59 |
| Saberhagen, Bret | 266 | 0.233 | 0.280 | 0.402 | 0.682 | 1.16 |
| Welch, Bob | 266 | 0.244 | 0.312 | 0.391 | 0.703 | 1.36 |
| Whitson, Ed | 58 | 0.259 | 0.368 | 0.431 | 0.799 | 1.74 |
Batting line allowed vs RHB
| Player | AB | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WHIP |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Acker, Jim | 131 | 0.229 | 0.259 | 0.351 | 0.610 | 1.04 |
| Clemens, Roger | 274 | 0.223 | 0.279 | 0.358 | 0.637 | 1.14 |
| Henke, Tom | 51 | 0.294 | 0.294 | 0.412 | 0.706 | 1.25 |
| Key, Jimmy | 462 | 0.299 | 0.329 | 0.474 | 0.803 | 1.46 |
| Langston, Mark | 380 | 0.300 | 0.371 | 0.426 | 0.797 | 1.76 |
| McDowell, Roger | 51 | 0.216 | 0.310 | 0.373 | 0.683 | 1.35 |
| Olson, Gregg | 73 | 0.288 | 0.341 | 0.521 | 0.862 | 1.62 |
| Orosco, Jesse | 128 | 0.273 | 0.352 | 0.609 | 0.961 | 1.61 |
| Pena, Alejandro | 141 | 0.220 | 0.295 | 0.411 | 0.706 | 1.15 |
| Saberhagen, Bret | 286 | 0.297 | 0.333 | 0.465 | 0.798 | 1.45 |
| Welch, Bob | 223 | 0.242 | 0.293 | 0.363 | 0.656 | 1.19 |
| Whitson, Ed | 40 | 0.200 | 0.273 | 0.475 | 0.748 | 0.94 |
