The Charge Behind First Place

Soft baseball stadium ambience under, fades

CARLAIt is the third week of June, game calendar, and the league has handed us the kind of standings that doesn't need a host to explain it. The Iron Knob Explosions are in first place. The Rick Astleys, second, by a single game. Both teams in the seventies for win percentage. Both teams writing their own week.

CARLABut the wire — the league's own wire — already wrote the headline before we got here. Batter of the Week, Davis of the Astleys. Pitcher of the Week, Smith of the Astleys. Team of the Week, the Huanca Wankers. Two of three trophies in one clubhouse.

RAZOR(beat) Carla, the league algorithm doesn't even leave us anything to argue about.

CARLATwenty-two wins in their last twenty-eight. Eight-and-two in the last ten. Five-game winning streak.

RAZORAnd the team in first place is one win away from looking up at them. The Astleys won't say they're charging — the charge is doing its own talking. You can be in first place and still feel like the team behind you is the story. That's where Iron Knob is right now. Quietly leading. Loudly being chased.

CARLAWelcome to Foul Territory. I'm Carla Streich. With me, as always, Razor Shines. Through June seventeenth, World League Baseball Season One.

CARLASix teams between five-seventy-six and six-seventy-two. Iron Knob. Astleys. Slap Daddies. Wankers. Crepe Wrappers. Honey Badgers. The standings have compressed.

RAZORThat's a six-team race. That's the first time we can say that this season. We've had four-team races, we've had top-heavy races. What we've got now is a bunch.

CARLAWe'll get to all of it. Iron Knob and the Astleys at the top. The Wankers' complicated week. Slap Daddies surging. The Honey Badgers got their teeth into something against Huanca. We've got a Trade Watch segment debuting tonight as the deadline gets closer.

RAZORAnd I hear we've got a familiar voice on the line later.

CARLAWe do.

RAZORGood.

CARLAFirst — the Astleys.

CARLAForty-four wins. Twenty-four losses. Six-forty-seven. Most wins in the league. Five-game winning streak coming in. Eight-and-two in the last ten.

RAZORThe Astleys could be running away with this thing in any other race, but they're not. They're running behind a team that's also winning. (beat) We're going to be doing a lot of math like that this season.

CARLAScott Garrelts. Nine wins. No losses. Two-thirty-one ERA.

RAZORCarla. We said this guy was undervalued in the preseason. We said it in episode one. He's got nine wins, no losses, sub-two-fifty. We will be taking our victory lap slowly, with dignity. Mark it down.

CARLA(deadpan) Marking it down.

RAZORBryn Smith — eleven wins. Three losses. League leader in wins. Hundred and three innings. He's just standing out there throwing innings. Whatever they're feeding him in the Astleys clubhouse, somebody bottle it.

CARLAEric Davis. League's official Batter of the Week. Three-hundred batting average, three-eighty-one on-base, six-oh-three slugging. Twenty-four home runs. Sixty-six runs batted in.

RAZORThat is a season. That is a real season.

CARLAHe's seven-for-seven on stolen bases.

RAZOR(brief) The man does not get caught.

CARLAAnd Wade Boggs is leading the league in on-base percentage at four-thirty-eight.

RAZORBoggs leads the league in on-base, and he's not even the Astleys' Batter of the Week. Think about that for a second. (beat) We'll come back to Boggs later. Hold that thought.

CARLA(continuing) And quickly — there's been some chatter coming out of the Astleys clubhouse this dump. I'll just say it: their manager called the Iron Knob series before it started. He said the Iron Knobs were going to rust. They went two-of-three from Iron Knob the next week.

RAZORThere's been some bold talk over there. He's been calling shots, and the shots have been landing. Sometimes a team gets to a point in a season where the manager is calling them, and the team executes. Astleys are at that point. (measured) Now — that doesn't mean the calls keep landing. We'll see how it ages. If he's wrong next week, we will be the first to note it. (beat) Lovingly.

CARLAOne last note. The Astleys are zero-and-twenty when trailing after the seventh inning.

RAZORI feel sure they know that. Probably pains them inside.

CARLAThey're thirty-nine-and-one when leading after the seventh.

RAZORThat's an identity, Carla. You become what your bullpen lets you be. Eckersley locks the door, the lineup just doesn't catch up. They lead and win. They trail and lose. (beat) I think we just unlocked something. They don't do close games. We'll need to revisit this.

CARLAStandings through June seventeenth.

CARLAIron Knob Explosions, forty-three and twenty-one, six-seventy-two. Rick Astleys, forty-four and twenty-four, six-forty-seven, one game back. Knockemstiff Slap Daddies, forty-two and twenty-six, six-eighteen, three back. Huanca Wankers, forty-one and twenty-eight, five-ninety-four, four-and-a-half back. Nicaragua Crepe Wrappers, thirty-eight and twenty-seven, five-eighty-five, five-and-a-half back. Fugging Honey Badgers, thirty-eight and twenty-eight, five-seventy-six, six back.

CARLAThe Oak Ridge Nukes are twelve-and-fifty-six. The Panama City Beach Hurricanes are eight-and-fifty-six.

RAZORWe'll get to those teams when there is something to say.

CARLAWankers. Team of the Week.

RAZOR(neutral) Mm. Nice for them.

CARLASix wins in a stretch. The league's algorithm picked them up. Officially.

RAZORHey, I'm not arguing with the algorithm. I'm just absorbing the irony before we proceed.

CARLAHoward Johnson, third base. Two-eighty-eight average. Three-fifty on-base. Six-ten slugging. Twenty-one home runs. Forty-one runs batted in. Fifty-two runs scored. He's their actual offensive engine.

RAZORHoJo. He's been doing this all season. Mitchell and Bonilla suck up all the leaderboard oxygen, but Howard Johnson on the Wankers is a forty-home-run-pace player having a forty-home-run-pace year. That's the team's offense.

CARLAQuick housekeeping — the Wankers have lost David Cone to the injured list. Listed June twelfth. General. Sixteen days. Returns June twenty-eighth.

RAZORLosing your ace for sixteen days of a pennant race tends to change a manager's tone. Phones get picked up. We'll come back to that in Trade Watch.

CARLALast week the Wankers were swept four straight by the Explosions. By a combined score of twenty-five to ten.

RAZORFour straight. Then they go to PCB and win three. Then they lose three of four to the Honey Badgers. Then they win three more from the Hurricanes. The Wankers are a different team every series. (beat) They are, however, the official Team of the Week. I want everyone listening to hold both of those facts in their head at the same time.

CARLAThey're zero-and-four against the Slap Daddies.

RAZORRight. Different teams have different problems. Now it seems the Wankers' problem is playing anyone but PCB. (beat) Onward.

CARLASpeaking of teams the Wankers can't beat right now — the Honey Badgers were previously winless against them. Oh-and-eight all-time entering this stretch. They stood up and took three of four.

RAZORThree out of four. That's a statement.

CARLAIncluding a nine-zero shutout on June thirteenth. Mike Moore went six innings, four hits, no runs. Greg Minton finished it off with three innings of relief. Combined eight strikeouts. The Wankers had five hits in the entire game.

RAZORThat shutout, Carla — that's the Honey Badgers emphatically flinging the monkey off their back. (beat) Pausing just long enough to acknowledge the absurdity of the sentence I just spoke. But the point stands. They've been waiting for this.

CARLAGame-winning RBI on the day — Whitt. The catcher.

RAZOROf course it was. (beat) The Honey Badgers spent eight games trying to figure out how to beat the Wankers, and when they finally did, the GWRBI came off the bat of the catcher. Who was then pulled in the sixth for Carlton Fisk. Who also drove in a run. Who is forty-one years old. Two catchers split that game between them.

CARLAAnd the next day —

RAZORYes —

CARLAEight to five over the Wankers. Winning pitcher McCaskill, Montgomery for the save — number twenty.

RAZORAnd the GWRBI?

CARLAFisk.

RAZOR(beat) The forty-one-year-old catcher with a two-run home run. Sixth of the season. Honey Badgers ended the schneid with a backstop platoon. (beat) Sometimes a team breaks a streak in unusual handwriting.

CARLAThe schneid is officially broken.

RAZORIndeed. Now — Cone went on the injured list mid-series. So it is a bit unclear exactly what caused the shift. Maybe Cone going down opened a door. Maybe the Honey Badgers just figured something out. Maybe both. Either way, oh-eight is dead.

CARLAThe Honey Badgers then dropped the next two to the Astleys to close the stretch.

RAZORYes they did. So they're still sixth in a six-team race. They bit something, they got bit a bit, they're still in the conversation.

CARLADoug Drabek still on the injured list. Listed June fourth. General. Sixteen days. Returns June twentieth.

RAZORRotation hole. Tough timing. They've got Stewart slotting in, McCaskill and Moore eating innings. Not a lot of margin if anyone else goes.

CARLAOne more thing. Jeff Montgomery. Twenty saves on twenty-one chances. Two-oh-nine ERA.

RAZORThat right there is the only thing keeping the Honey Badgers within shouting distance. Career first half for Jeff Montgomery. Best closer in the league by save percentage. Team scores enough, the rotation is what it is, and Montgomery slams the door.

CARLASlap Daddies. Forty-two and twenty-six. Eight-and-two in their last ten. Three-game winning streak. Pinned at third because the two teams in front of them are also winning.

RAZORThat's the kind of stretch that gets a team a trophy in a normal week. Iron Knob and Astleys are absorbing all the oxygen.

CARLAThe top three OPS hitters in the league are all Slap Daddies. Bonilla, Mitchell, McGriff.

RAZORThat's a team.

CARLAKevin Mitchell. Thirty-two home runs. Seventy-seven runs batted in. Seven-nineteen slugging.

RAZORHe's hitting the ball into orbit. He hits a home run every eight at-bats. McGriff's a hair behind him. Bonilla's hitting three-seventy. (beat) The Slap Daddies have a lineup that would intimidate me, and I played in nineteen-eighty-five.

CARLABonilla's hit streak is at ten games.

RAZORI'll tell you what — Bonilla is having a year that I don't think we've talked about enough. Hitting three-seventy. The man hits everything. He hits triples. He's a switch-hitter playing third base. I don't know how many times I'm allowed to mention him in one segment, but he's earning the air time.

CARLA(small note made) Noted.

RAZORNow the catch. Todd Burns at the back of the bullpen. Seven saves on eleven chances. Three blown.

CARLAA lineup second only to the Astleys, and a save percentage in the sixties.

RAZORThe Slap Daddies should be running away with this. They're not, because every fifth or sixth lead they hand the ball to a man who's still finding his slider. (beat) If Burns settles down, I don't see who beats them. If he doesn't, we'll keep talking about Mitchell's home runs and they'll finish third. That's the season for them.

CARLACrepe Wrappers — thirty-eight and twenty-seven. Six-and-four in the last ten, but they're on a two-game losing streak coming in. They lost two straight to the Iron Knobs to close.

RAZORSaberhagen is still good. Five-and-four, three-sixty-nine. They have the rotation to be in the top three. Their bullpen has been the question all season.

CARLAIron Knob — first place. Forty-three and twenty-one.

RAZORI'll tell you what's happening over there. Bert Blyleven came off the IL and is leading the league in walks-per-nine at one. One walk per nine innings. The man is thirty-eight years old and he's painting the corners.

CARLAAnd Maddux is twenty-three and seven-and-one with a three-forty-eight.

RAZORThe old man and the kid. Both holding court for Andrew. Hershiser is still pitching well. Kevin Brown is at two-forty-four. (beat) That is a rotation. That is what a rotation looks like.

CARLAStrawberry's hitting two-oh-nine.

RAZORTwelve home runs. Walks, strikeouts, the occasional home run. He's either changing the game or losing it. There's no third option for him right now. Andrew will figure it out. Or he won't. Either way, the team's in first place.

CARLAPanamaCityBeach Hurricanes are on a twelve-game losing streak.

RAZOR(long pause) Twelve. And not sure the end is in sight.

CARLAAnd the Nukes are one-and-nine in their last ten.

RAZORMm.

CARLAAround the league.

CARLAWe're rolling out a new segment tonight. Trade Watch. The trading deadline is approaching. Razor and I are going to do exactly what trade-deadline talk should do: observe.

RAZORWe're not making recommendations. We don't run anybody's roster. We just listen for what teams need, and we say it out loud.

CARLAFour observations.

RAZOROne. The Wankers. David Cone is on the IL for sixteen days of a tight race. They're four-and-a-half games out. If you're David Cone's manager, your phone is ringing. And if it's not, you're calling somebody. Wankers are looking for a starter who can stabilize a rotation that just lost its best arm. They're a buyer.

CARLATwo.

RAZORSlap Daddies. That bullpen is a soft spot, and it's been a soft spot all season. Burns and Darwin both have multiple blown saves. They've got the loudest offense in the league and the leakiest closer outside Wankers' Lee Smith. If the Slap Daddies want to win in October, they are going to need a back-end arm. They are a buyer for relief.

CARLAThree.

RAZORHoney Badgers. They gutted the bench earlier this season. They were already thin. Drabek's down. Brett's still finding his swing. Any further injury becomes a crisis. They're a depth buyer if they're a buyer at all. Their problem is they don't have surplus to trade.

CARLAFour.

RAZORCrepe Wrappers. This is the most interesting one. Elite rotation. Saberhagen, Clemens, Welch, Key. They've got holes in the bullpen and a lineup that's solid but not loud. So are they a buyer trying to catch the top three, or a seller realizing the top three are pulling away? That's the question for Carpenter. (beat) I don't know the answer.

CARLAWe'll have answers eventually.

RAZORWe'll have trades eventually. Then we'll have answers. Until then, this is what the field is shaped like. Trade Watch is on.

CARLAWe've got a call on the line. Long-time listener. Welcome back, Mel. Where've you been?

MEL(slightly winded, kitchen-table voice) Doctor's appointments. Then I caught up on the show. Which I see has gotten ahead of me.

RAZORWe try not to.

MELI appreciated the show last time. I took a few weeks. But I've been listening, and I've been writing things down. (beat) I think you brought up Bobby Bonilla a few minutes ago, Razor.

RAZORI did, Mel. I gave him his due.

MELYou did. But — and forgive me — I think you have the wrong frame.

RAZOR(genuinely curious) Tell me.

MELIt's not a Bonilla story. (papers shuffling) I have it here. Top six on-base-plus-slugging leaders in the league. (reading) Bonilla. Mitchell. McGriff. Davis. Johnson. Boggs. (beat) Three of those six are third basemen.

RAZOR(beat) Hold on.

MELBonilla, Slap Daddies. Howard Johnson, Wankers. Wade Boggs, Astleys. Bonilla's at one-one-one-seven OPS. Johnson, nine-sixty-one. Boggs is at nine-thirty-eight, and he leads the league in on-base percentage at four-thirty-eight.

RAZOR...Mel. I had not noticed that.

CARLA(quietly) I told you to hold that thought.

RAZORYou did, Carla. You did.

MELThree of the top six. At a position that historically asks for defense first. At the hot corner. You used to expect a glove. You're getting an MVP-quality bat in three different uniforms.

CARLAThat's a real number, Razor.

RAZORIt's a great number. (to Mel) So when you listen to me say "we don't talk about Bonilla enough," your read is that even that frame is off — because the story isn't Bonilla. It's the position.

MELThe position is having a season. Bonilla is the headline. He happens to be the loudest of three.

RAZORNow that is a Mel observation. (warm) Mel, we're going to give the hot corner its due. Carla, write that down.

CARLAAlready did, Razor.

RAZORMel, thank you for that.

MELAnytime. I'll be listening.

CARLAThanks, Mel.

[CLICK]

RAZORThree third basemen. (slowly) That's a column.

CARLAMaybe somebody writes it.

RAZORMaybe. (beat) Maybe we beat them to it.

CARLAThat's Foul Territory through June seventeenth. Iron Knob in first by one. Astleys charging. Slap Daddies surging. Wankers complicated. Honey Badgers with their teeth back. Crepe Wrappers and a question. Hurricanes on a streak we cringe to say out loud.

RAZORAnd the hot corner is having a year.

CARLAWe'll be back when the simulation gives us the next batch. For Razor Shines, I'm Carla Streich.

RAZORBarely affiliated. Lightly sanctioned. Not stopping.

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